First, I am saddened this Wednesday morn to find out that Kevin Aucoin, my very favorite make-up artist (I was secretly going to hire him to be my best gay male friend and personal make-up artist when I finally "made it") has died! This is really, really sad news. For you ladies out there, he had his own column in Allure magazine that had real tips on the best way to apply eyeliner, etc.--and darn if it wasn't my personal bible of sorts. He also made this amazing book where he "made-up" movie stars like Drew Barrymore and Gwyneth Paltrow to look like other stars of the fifties, etc. it was really amazing. Truly, a moment of silence.
Now, back to your regularly scheduled program. . .
A few burning questions/issues come to mind this Tuesday eve as I joined the other 5,999,999 Americans in viewing the season finale of the Osbornes (and assorted other MTV programming/commercials/mindcontrol):
1) Are there really still people that think Ozzy Osborne is "evil," or has that very 1980s fear of heavy metal now been replaced by an equally hysterical fear of hip-hop/"gangster"rap, now slowly being replaced by my own personal fear of 13-year-old white suburban Detroit male fans of ICP?
2) Can anyone understand what Shakira is saying in "Un-der-neeth Yooor Close"(I swear one line is "Like an old woman tied to her mother" and "everything I deesiiiiiire for bein' such a good geerl, for bein' such a good geerl HONEY!"? Yet I can't stop listening to it! Plus, I know she's singing about the former (or was he reinstated?) President of Argentina's son whom she is dating, and apparently she is practically a Colombian Pop Saint whom Gabriel Garcia Marquez has written extensively about. No lie.
3) I am happy to report that Jennifer Lopez must have borrowed a wig from the fabulous VH-1 movie collection bin (see: "The Beach Boys" and the "Rick Nelson Story") for her latest Ashley Judd-esque "Help My Husband Is A Hot and Successful White Collar Mad Man Trying to Kill Me!" Lifetime-ready movie.
4) Why does Serena Altschul exist?
5) I think I may have a crush on the lead singer of Incubus.
6) There is a sudden propensity of full-on belly-dancing in various R & B/ Hip Hop videos.
7) I cannot stop filing this useless knowledge and have nearly convinced myself that I may have a slight (read: slight) form of autism that allows for such knowledge storing/total recall.
Art, Jobs, Babies! - 2005-03-07
Wedding in Exile - 2005-02-26
Oscars! Movies! Glammer! - 2005-02-24
Monday Blues - 2005-02-14
oscar shmoscar - 2005-02-10
