Get this: I got FLASHED last night! Right in front of my apartment!
So, there I was, like a good law-abiding citizen out at 11:45pm to move my (rental) car to the opposite side of the street because of an 8AM street cleaning (boo!). Anyway, I had a little trouble parallel parking in front of my building because my rental "car" is actually an SUV. Anyway, as I went to pull out again, I saw this guy standing in front of a truck across the street. He was kind of flailing his arms to get my attention, and then I looked and he was STARK naked. And, I believe (ahem) wiggled his wiener at me! It was so gross and disturbing all I could do was shake my head in disgust and drive off. And, for some reason, while it was happening, I kept thinking "He looks like that 'Soy Bomb' guy that ran out on stage naked during Bob Dylan's performance at the Grammy's (?).
He was young--probably drunk (?) God. I hope he was drunk. If this is some new "welcome to the neighborhood" tactic, I'm not down with seeing my neighbors naked! So, I re-parked my "car" far away. Then, I got freaked out that he was going to run up to me and like, touch me or something. And, I had a terrible image of having to punch him out and then deal with this naked and knocked out guy at 11:45pm. I so did not want to deal with naked strangers at that hour, and in the middle of the street. Coincidentally, that's another reason I would have loathed the 60s. Lots of yucky naked people waving weiners all around as some expression of "freedom." Also, I find flacid male genitalia totally gross.
Again, I must ask, "Why me?"
I want my gossip! - 2005-08-17
Goodbye, BGT! - 2005-08-08
hell hath no fury like a awriting workshop - 2005-08-01
My Love Don't Cost a Thing - 2005-07-14
Kiss My Grits! - 2005-07-06
